


The Girl Who Cried Wolf

by notimmortal



Series: Invisible [4]
Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Angst, Gen, High Sherlock, I'm Sorry, Songfic, Still, kind of ooc, mentions of drug use
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-17
Updated: 2016-01-17
Packaged: 2018-05-14 13:40:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,622
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5745925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notimmortal/pseuds/notimmortal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Is anyone there? Is anyone there at all?</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Girl Who Cried Wolf

**Author's Note:**

> The song chosen was "The Girl Who Cried Wolf" by 5 Seconds of Summer and the lyrics are in italics.
> 
> This is probably really ooc I'm so sorry

_Every time you say to me it’s over, you just want to start again. It’s just lies._

It was Greg that had finally tipped me off on Sherlock’s problems.

 

“He doesn’t leave the house anymore, John,” Greg said, barging into my house while Mary was out. “He’s doesn’t solve cases. He’s constantly high,” Greg’s voice was raising with each phrase. “And you know what the worst part of this is? When I told him he was wasting his life, he said he had no life since YOU WERE GONE!”

 

I step back, startled by the sudden outburst of anger at the end of Greg’s sentence. “Are you saying that he’s high… Because of me?”

 

Greg sighs, putting on hand over his eyes. “You were supposed to be there for him. You were supposed to at least talk to him. It’s just like the last time, John. You left him alone to be with Mary. Even when you said you wouldn’t leave him, you still did.”

 

I was taken aback. I had never realized that me not being there hurt Sherlock this much. I always thought that he needed the space from me, that I didn’t mean all that much to him.

 

_The girl who cried wolf every day, ignored by gravity but in the end don’t ask why._

 

“John,” Greg said, breaking the silence. “Do you even care about him at all?”

 

“Of course I do! How can you even ask that?”

 

“Because I’ve seen you two, and you’re both so obviously in love with each other that it makes me nauseous. But even after all these years, you choose to avoid him instead of doing something. You choose to stay in this fake, domesticated bubble with the person who shot your best friend rather than just tell Sherlock the truth,” Greg’s tone is blunt, but he’s right. I know he is.

 

_You say you wanna, but do you wanna run away? Your great escape._

“I…”

 

“You need to go see him, John. Before he takes too much or puts a bullet in his brain,” With that, Greg left.

 

I sat there for a while, thinking about what Greg had told me. He was right, I did love Sherlock. I always had. But I couldn’t just leave Mary. That would be wrong.

 

_Where you going? Always running. Find a way to call it quits again._

Mary came home to me sitting at the table in the exact same spot Greg had left me in. “You’re still here?”

 

My head snaps up to look at her. “Of course I am. Where else would I be?”

 

Mary shook her head and sat down. “Is no one going to get through to you at all?”

 

“What?”

 

“I told Greg to come here. Well, I had Mycroft do it, but that’s not the point. You’re not happy here, John. You say you are, but I know you’re not. You don’t love me in the way that you love Sherlock. Anyone can see that,” Mary’s voice is soft, comforting. If only what she said wasn’t so hard to hear.

 

“I do love you, Mary. You’re my wife, the mother of my child-“

 

“Is that the only reason you love me, though?”

 

“Mary-“

 

“I’m having Mycroft annul our marriage,” She said bluntly. “You’re not happy, and I can’t stand to see you like that.”

 

“But I love you,” I protest weakly. “And I have to be here for the baby.”

 

“The baby doesn’t exist, John. Just like I don’t exist.”

 

“What? You’re not…”

 

“I’m sorry. I wanted to keep you with me. But I love you too much to hurt you like this any longer. Go find Sherlock before it’s too late.”

 

I stand up and look back at Mary. “Thank you, Mary.”

 

“Goodbye, John.”

 

***

 

The ride back to Baker Street seemed far too long. It had been such a long time since I had made that journey, it was hard to believe I was going back.

 

I still had my key, so I let myself into the flat. I was greeted by the sight of Sherlock, noticeably disheveled, in his chair. He looked so much thinner than I remembered. “Oh Sherlock, what have you done?”

 

_Look at me in the eye. Is anyone there at all? Is anyone there at all? Cos I’m not dreaming._

“You need to wake up, Sherlock,” I say, trying to get him to open his eyes without scaring him too much. When he doesn’t stir at all, I begin to shake his shoulders. “Sherlock, wake up.”

 

I watch as Sherlock’s eyes slowly blink open. He stares at me for a moment, disbelief in his eyes. “John?”

 

_Look at me in the eye. Is anyone there at all? Is anyone there at all? Cos I’m not leaving._

“Oh Sherlock. Why have you done this to yourself?” It was killing me to see him like this, slowly deteriorating from his former self.

 

I saw something click within Sherlock’s eyes, and then he was pushing me off of him. “You’re not real. You’re gone.”

 

_Why does it have to be this tragedy, this endless lost parade? A castle of a façade of make believe? The truth is spelled out in your eyes, why don’t you just reach out and make it clear to me? What are you telling me?_

“I’m not gone, Sherlock. I’m right here. Right here in front of you,” My voice sounded pleading, even to my own ears. I couldn’t imagine how that must’ve sounded to Sherlock.

 

“You’re a memory, a figment of my imagination produced by the drugs,” Sherlock pauses, pondering his surroundings. “It’s been a while since we’ve been in the present. Nice change of pace, I suppose.”

 

_You say you wanna, but do you wanna run away? Your great escape. Where you going? Always running. Find a way to call it quits again._

Sherlock’s words cut me to my core. Had I really been the one to do this to him? This was my fault. I couldn’t believe it. I reached forward and pulled Sherlock into my arms, realizing the tears that were falling from my eyes. “I’m really here, Sherlock. I’m right here and I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I wasn’t here to stop this, stop it before it became a problem.”

 

Sherlock shook his head, his arms still at his sides even though my arms were wrapped around him. “You can’t be real. John is gone. John has been gone. John has been gone since Moriarty was defeated,” I felt tears from Sherlock’s eyes falling onto me.

 

_Look at me in the eye. Is anyone there at all? Is anyone there at all? Cos I’m not dreaming. Look at me in the eye. Is anyone there at all? Is anyone there at all? Cos I’m not leaving._

“Sherlock, I am right here. I’m real, I’m here. Please, stop this. Snap out of it,” I could feel the tears leaving my eyes at an alarming rate. My arms tightened around Sherlock, begging for him to reciprocate. “I’m here. I’m real. Please, Sherlock, I can’t lose you again.”

 

I feel Sherlock start to shake his head again and started to lose even more hope. Then I heard a soft, broken voice say, “John?”

 

“I’m here, Sherlock. I’m right here.”

 

Sherlock slowly wraps his arms around me. “I thought you were fake. I thought you were a trick being played by my mind,” Sherlock’s voice sounded so broken.

 

“I’m so sorry Sherlock. This is all my fault,” I don’t want to let him go, but I need to see his face. I begin to pull back, still sure to keep a hand on him.

 

_Is anyone there at all? Is anyone there at all? Is anyone there? Is anyone there at all? Is anyone there at all? Is anyone there at all? Is anyone there at all? Cos I’m not dreaming._

Sherlock’s face looks scared, like he’s afraid that this is still all in his mind. “I don’t want this to be a dream, John. I don’t think I could handle it if it were,” I’m about to assure Sherlock once again that I am here, when he speaks up once more. “All signs point to this being a dream. There is almost no likelihood that you would be here. So why do I keep reacting to you like you are here?”

 

_Is anyone there at all? Is anyone there at all? Is anyone there? Is anyone there at all?_

“I’m really here, Sherlock. I didn’t mean to leave you alone, I didn’t mean to do this to you. I never meant to make you believe I didn’t want to be here with you. There’s nowhere else I’d rather be,” My voice was shaking, but I knew I had to tell Sherlock the truth. “I love you, Sherlock. So very much. I never should have left with Mary. I’m sorry, I love you. Please forgive me.”

 

Sherlock, who had looked as if he were finally convinced I was actually here, began to shut down after that. “So this is a dream. I thought as much, but I was hoping…”

 

_Look at me in the eye. Is anyone there at all? Is anyone there at all? I’m not dreaming._

 

“No, Sherlock, I’m really here. I’m right here.”

 

“John doesn’t love me,” Sherlock said with astounding certainty. “Not anywhere besides in my mind.”

 

“Sherlock, please,” I begged. “I’m here.”

 

Sherlock patted my head. “It’s okay. I love John in every form, even in the one I created for myself.”

 

_Look at me in the eye. Is anyone there at all? Is anyone there at all?_

“Sherlock, I’m so sorry. I’m here. I won’t be leaving you again. I won’t.

 

_I’m not leaving._

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you guys enjoyed this, thank you for reading ^-^
> 
> The next part should be the last part, but who knows? Not I.


End file.
